Not Me! Monday

Ok, I wasn't going to do a Not Me! Monday post this week, but there's so many things that I didn't do...so, I'm writing them today to save you the novella next week.

I did not head to Sam's Club in paint-stained sweat pants, white t-shirt and unwashed hair ponied up with tennis shoes so that I could pretend that I was the just-finished-working-out-mom-running-a-quick-errand-on-the-way-home-from-the-gym instead of the too-lazy-to-give-a-darn-mom that I actually am.  Did it work?  Did I pull off the rouse?  Not sure, don't care.  What?!?!  Really?!?!  Nope!  Not me!  I would never go out in public without the 1 1/2 hour long grooming ritual that I do everyday.  Personal appearance- and what other's think of me- is always on the top of my priority list.  After all, what other's think of you completely determines one's self worth, right?  Right?  (crickets...)

I did not make my family wait for an hour after church with empty bellies and crabby attitudes so I could fix them a nutritious lunch.  I did not spend that hour talking to Dave about how the boys need to eat a more nutritiously balanced diet.  I did not serve C. Kraft Mac & Cheese and a hot dog for lunch today.  Nope, not me!  I'm always following through on doing the right thing- expecially when I've just had a serious conversation with my dear husband about it.  I am not consistently inconsistent.

I did not drag my two boys through a Hallmark store on the Saturday after Thanksgiving.  First, I would never brave the crowds with two children in tow, and second I would know better than to bring them to a Hallmark store.  Everyone knows that little boys cannot keep their hands to themselves, and bringing them to a Hallmark store is like bringing a bull through a China shop.  Not me!  I would never to that!  Not to myself.  Not to the boys.  Not to the poor Hallmark store owners.


A few things I did not say this past week:

• Um...A., I know you want to help daddy pick up Molly's poop.  Um...yeah, he uses gloves and a baggie to pick them up.  Yes, I know...that one was still warm.  Let's go find a sink with lots and lots of soap.  Now...where did daddy put the finger nail clippers?
• C....just because you could see her butt crack when she bent over, doesn't mean you need to put your finger in there. 
• C. did not say, "Time out sucks."  When I put him into time out last night....at our small bible study.

Ok, that's enough for this week.  Check here to see what everyone else has not been doing.