Saturday, September 12, 2020

This space

How have I neglected this space for so long?

This used to be a great space.

My space.

My corner of the world to be snarky, sassy, honest, me.

Part of me looks back and wonders

Where have I gone?

Did I evolve? Change with the times?

Or have I forgotten myself?

Put joy on the back burner?

The fact of the matter is that 

I miss this space.

Maybe this will become a gift to myself.

Wednesday, February 27, 2019


Hopper used to plow. When we first for married, he started doing it for extra money. And then, it just turned into a way to earn emjust enough to meet our medical deductibles. Then it became a bit too much, then a lot too much, then he just aged out.

Plowing is young man's work.

Hopper was called by his guy and asked to substitute plow for a night. He reluctantly agreed.

Because he knows it's hard on his body. It's hard on his brain.  It's hard on his regular work schedule. It's just hard.

But, he agreed.

Because, as a business owner,  he knows what it means to have unreliable labor. He knows what it means to want to maintain a good business reputation. So, he agreed.

To help a fellow business owner.

To help a friend.

To make some extra money.

So, as I'm setting the coffee pot to turn on at 2am, I prayed. For protection for this amazing man. For this man who doesn't think it's a big deal- what he's doing is daily work. It's just what he does.

But it's something I believe is worthy of admiration.

And respect.

Thursday, August 16, 2018

Marriage and morning people

I'm married to a morning person

I am not not NOT a morning person.

To top it off, my morning person gets up at 4:45 am (yes, on purpose!) to get some paperwork done before he leaves for the day.

Every morning at 7am (ish), he comes to wake me up and kiss me goodbye. 95% of the time, I am still asleep when he comes in.

He's geared up for the day.

I am still semi-comatose.

Clearly, a great time to have a conversation! This morning went like this:

D: what's on your agenda today?

Me: mmmmmmpppppffffffff

D: are you working today?

Me: uuuuuuuummmmm think so

D: did you see the new football practice times? 9:30 to eleven and 3 to 5:30. You're helping JT at the 11:30 one, right? Are you doing all the others too?

Me: sooooooo many nuuuuuuumbers.

D: what are you going to do with the kids?

Me: we have kids?

D:  what's the tee time on the calendar? You going golfing?

Me: what day is it again?


Me (again): yes....the orthodontist guy has patient appreciation....thanks for all your money, here have a golf ball.

D: I love you, have a good day.
Me: love you too. (Rolls over and dozes)

(He, on the other hand, is packed up and off to save the world- one well built house at a time).

Monday, July 16, 2018

Counting mine {482-493}

482. Summer

483. Returned phone calls

484. Invitations to dinner

485. Gin

486. Fantastic nephews

487. Family pictures where the kids play along

488. Being able to host dinner

489. Employment

490. Facebook marketplace. (I'll never pay full price for anything ever again!)

491. Friends with pools

492. Sunscreen

493. Fireworks

Thursday, November 30, 2017

Not great news ...

So, my friends....please forgive my faux pas in delivering hard news via social media- BUT I am coveting your prayer. I had an endometrial ablation last week, and pathology reports are now back showing cancer cells in my uterus. 
So, what do we know? Well, not much. We are in this horrible waiting period between dropping the big C-bomb and a call from the oncologist.  I do know that I can expect a full radical hysterectomy and lymph node resections. From there, pathology will tell us the official grade and the best course of treatment.
What do we need? (Besides a return call!!) Prayer. Lots of prayer, and I'm always available for free hugs. ;)  Lots of grace for some high-emotion kids, and some safe support for my husband. I'm sure as this ball starts rolling, we will have PLENTY of needs, and we will not hesitate to ask. (This may be hard for me-please keep reminding me to ask).  But those that already know- thank you for showing the amazing community in the body of Christ. You are His hands and feet, and He is shining Light through you. Thank you!

This is scary, this is hard, but God is near.

Saturday, July 29, 2017

Screen detox's where I lay myself vulnerable.

Here's where I show you a triumph.

I've been feeling quite convicted lately about screens. With our whole family in general, but especially with my kids.

What started as "background companion noise" when Adubya was a baby has turned into a full-blown lifestyle.

TV on all the time, 

tablets the go-to anesthesia.

Then MiddleC and LittleL had their tonsils out a month ago, and we hit deafcon 5 slothdom. TV was on all.the.time, charging cables were in every outlet.

You guys, it was bad.

Two weeks ago, we were taking Adubya to camp,  and I took the opportunity to plant a seed with the kids: I explained my concern about their behavior now, what it means for their future, and the sadness it brought me. 

They all actually thought about it.

We decreased screens quite a bit while Adubya was gone.  Then, the day we picked him up, we left for camping.

Sunday to Sunday my boy had gone without any screen. So, I was time.

Monday morning, the screens went silent.

We went Monday through Friday without any screen of any sort.

(Exception: my phone. I used it to contact people to make play dates and coordinate some of my commitments).

I'm going to do my findings in list form:

- With the exception of Monday morning,  every morning thereafter was blissfully silent. I came out to both boys reading on the couches. Now, if LittleL was up before me, I HAD to get up since she requires adult supervision,  but even toward the end of the week, Adubya was pouring her cereal, and MiddleC was reading her books. (Bless me!)

- Both boys made themselves goals to finish books. MiddleC finished 3, Adubya finished a long one and started on another. They both enjoyed reading these books, and were excited to tell me about what they were reading. (Not super exciting stufd, but they wanted to tell me, so I'll listen anyday!!)

-Errands were fun. Yep, you heard me....FUN. Why? Because no one was trying to rush me through anything to get back home to screens. At one point, Adubya said "yeah, let's try there too...we've got nothing but time..."

- The boys worked together. Monday, they came up with the idea of a cardboard fort. They put their money together to buy a roll of gorilla tape, asked me to drive them around looking for cardboard, and built a fort. This was not without artistic differences, mind you, but after a little FOB time, and a quick talk from mom, they quickly joined forces again and built a fortress.

- We had a total of 4 meltdowns this week. Four.  (Bonus! None of them mine! Ha!). You guys...coming off screens ends up in daily meltdowns from each kid. Multiple daily meltdowns for one specific kiddo.  Four. Blissful four. What a difference!!! (FOUR!!!)

- I stepped up my parenting game. I almost felt like a teacher: planning out our days ahead of time. I was careful to have a little bit of fun time with friends,  physical activity time, quiet time, and then unstructured play. I was present. I was engaged.  Guess what? I liked it. And I have some pretty amazing kids with some great things to say.

- I became an authority in their lives again. Not a problem with LittleL,  but with the boys, they had started untying apron strings on me. They were listening to their bloggers more than me- this week, they reengaged with me too. While they do listen to me, I think the dialogue changed this week. It was more open, honest, fun, and encouraging. 

- Chores got done. Timely and completely.  It was great! We did less chores at the beginning of the week, and kept life fun to encourage us to get to Friday. We did more and more toward the end of the week,  but they were motivated because there was the promise of ice cream and a movie on Friday night.

- We had fun. Structured and unstructured fun. Talking, swimming, laughing, board games, fun.

So, going forward, what does this mean?

Well, we're going to try to let them have some screens, but nothing close to where it was before.

I remember once,  a mentor of mine, Cheryl, called screens a theif.

She was right: they steal.

They steal attention, brain cells, time, parental control,  imagination.

I let that theif keep stealing things until I had little left to give.

No more.

So, we're going to try to do light screens for now, and if the meltdowns come back, if the time gets stolen, if the obsession returns, then they all go off.

For good.

And I'd be totally OK with that!

Saturday, June 24, 2017

Smart guy

Dave: Did you get your haircut today?

Me: no (thinking what did I do differently this morning to make my hair look just-cut worthy)

Me: why? Does it look different?

Dave:  Nah. Just being proactive.