Sunday, April 27, 2014

Have you ever....

Have you ever...

....had a meal planned (and started on) only to realize you were out of an item, so you switch gears and start to make something else... only to realize you were out of 2 items for that particular dish?  And then just start dumping random items from the pantry on the family plates?  Including random Halloween noodles?

.... thought you remembered someone's name... so you call them that name for an HOUR with great I-am-a-fantastic-name-rememberer confidence only to have someone tell you later that their name was Jane.  NOT Beth.  Definitely not Beth.

.... worn the same outfit two days in a row (changing undergarments, of course) simply to escape another day of laundry?

.... driven out of your way (like 8 miles out of your way) to go to a coffee house with a drive thru window- as opposed to just parking the car and lugging the toddler inside?

... gone so many days between full showers that you cannot remember the last time you washed your hair?

....ever unexpectantly encountered someone in the store and had an immediate yucky feeling- realizing that you have been harboring a grudge for the last 14 years?

.... begged your mom to record the Little Couple on her DVR because you're too cheap to pay for the next tier up on cable? 

..... considered cancelling the cable all together? 

.... ran the (already clean) dishwasher again- just so you don't have to empty it before the husband gets home?

.... neglected everything in the house just to finish the book you started?

..... passed gas and blamed it on the kids?

....  make grandiose plans for a breaking-in-the-new-deck party on a deck that hasn't been built yet?

..... seriously wondered if something that you believed in was letting you down?

.... let go of your fitness routine for so long that you DREAD getting back on the horse?

.... sold a board game at a consignment sale - only because it's the most boring game in the world and you're sick of picking up all the pieces?

.... dropped the ball so badly on planning summer activities for your kids that their first choices are full?

....lost your son's baseball socks?  Both pairs?

.... bring your middle child late to his soccer game?

....put your toddler on a leash?

....had a dream about your husband and took most of the next day trying not to be mad at him... for what he did.....IN YOUR DREAM?/

                                                                                                            Um... yeah, me neither.

Monday, April 21, 2014

Just because

Easter is an amazing holiday.

We worship an amazing God.

Easter hymns give me Goosebumps.

Easter breakfast at church was the best ever.

Easter get-togethers with family are super fun.

Easter Monday off school spending time with the kiddos is the best yet.

Wearing them out having fun all day to come home, cuddle on the couch and take a snooze... amazing.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

The Facebook Status updates that never happened

I've been in a bit of a funk lately.

I'm going to blame it on the extended doldrums of winter that will just not end.

And let you know that it has nothing whatsoever to do with being hormonally charged.

But that last statement may make me a lying liar.

I've learned to steer clear of Facebook during such times.  I've learned that it's hard to bite my tongue control my fingers on the keyboard when I see read questionable choices and character.

But, since it's my blog...and sometimes I need to let off some steam, here you go.

The status updates that never happened.

Feel free to judge.  I'm ok with that.  Because next week(ish) I will be back to normal(ish) and rational again.

  • Yes, please tell me again - with MORE caps and exclamation points this time- how horrible people are that don't fully support the LGBT community.  Because your bully-ism is really making me think "well, this is a community of people with their heads on straight.". (pun intended)

  • Raise your hand if you can't afford your spring break vacation that your currently on: the payment that will follow you via credit card interest for the next 6 years until you claim bankruptcy and affect inflation- so everyone else will end up reaping the consequences of your vacation.  Really, you're only camouflaging the fact that you've made some bad choices in your life.  Please look up counselors, not travel agents.

  • Just because your ex-girlfriend says "hello" to you in passing doesn't mean she wants you.  She was being polite. 

  • You can disagree and be respectful at the same time.

  • Mother Nature, you are dead to me.  (Not posted only because 94% of my Facebook feed is currently weather related).

  • Why, yes... post about your new car.  Oh!  I really enjoy the 12 shots of different angles that you've posted.  Why didn't you post the loan paperwork as well?  Go ahead and post that bottom line number that says how much you'll have paid at the end of your 6 year loan.  Then we can all have a good laugh.

  • When did Easter become more about the full basket and less about the empty tomb?

  • My daughter broke my toe (insert gross picture here)- I saved that one for twitter.  Facebook friends, be grateful.

  • How many times can one baby poop?  In one hour?

  • I can't tell you the last time I showered.
  • Let's see how many selfies one can post in one day....  OH- and there's another.

  • Please.... for the love of all that is good and holy, please-no more duck face.

  • My daughter laughs at farts.  I laugh at her laughing at farts.  Apparently, laughing IS contagious.

  • If you post pictures of yourself scantily clad in a bathing suit (or Speedo... ugh), be prepared for backlash and/or unfriending.  No one needs to see "LOOK AT ME- man" (or woman).  Are you aware that you are potentially making people nauseated- or turning them on?  You know... people that AREN'T your spouse?!?!?

  • You can choose one: be a part of the solution or a part of the problem.  Choose wisely.

  • Just found a sticker in my daughter's diaper.  A sticker than had gone through the digestive tract.  I'll spare you the picture.  You're welcome.

And thanks to this blog post, I just saved myself $50 in therapy or prescription money for Prozac.  Thanks, friend!

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Top ten: things I learned while coordinating an auction

1.  Many hands make light work.  I've heard it before... and I've seen it in action. But this was the epitome of NEEDING many hands.  We could have used another dozen (or so) hands, BUT the hands that did show up came ready to work, call, program, design, etc. I loved my team.

2.  There is no limit to the patience my husband holds.  The late nights, the meetings, the running of errands, the messy, messy house.  Have I mentioned the messy house???

3.  I do not multi-task well.  I used to, but this is a skill obviously lost with age.  Or child birth.  I'm going to go with the latter- simply because it makes me feel young(er). Anyway... one thing at a time. Focus, finish and move on.  That is all.

4. We have enough pairs of underwear and socks to not do laundry for 2 weeks. Although, by day 10, the outfits start getting pretty inventive.

5.  I have a pretty amazing network of prayer warriors and friends.  People. Who aren't afraid to text, email and stop me for a hug letting me know they're praying for me and our group.  Including my husband (see also #2) who sent me a sweet (and lengthy- which doesn't usually happen with his calloused fingers) text that filled the brims of my eyes.  Ones that will commit to pray, watch my kids, and even show up at the auction in support.  Love them!

6.  Coordinating an auction is about as stressful (and fun) as coordinating a wedding.  Minus the whole major-life-change to follow it.  Or the anticipation of the wedding night.

7.  I can log 16,076 steps on my ifit pedometer and still walk on my flat feet.  Even though it hurts...I *can* move.

8.  Being grateful is much easier than being spiteful.  I struggled at times thinking "why aren't they coming or why aren't they donating???". But, reminding myself to be thankful for the people that WERE there and having fun with those in attendance helped me stay positive.  Their absence was not a reflection of me, and it was nice to be reminded of that.

9. You learn a LOT from business owners' reactions when you come to them for donations.  When you have nothing tangible to offer in return.  A lot.  Some- with a gladly giving heart- pull out a donation and send you with arms full.  Others make you jump through hoops (to make sure you're legit), but will send a donation.  Others?  They ignore you, insult you, or demand compensation.  Again, remembering that it's not a reflection of me was helpful.

10.  God is God and God is good.  Giving this auction to God constantly helped soothe my worries.  We set our goal pretty high, and we managed to get within a stone's throw of it!  Even if we only made $5, we would still have been grateful.