"I need to be more upbeat, like you, Sandy. You're always so positive and bubbly."
Well, not today.
I had considered not writing this...
..you know, to maintain my "sunshine and rainbow" facade.
But, I wanted to show you that even positive people can get trapped in a downward spiral.
That we struggle too.
That even when the sun peaks out from a mid February gloom, there are still tears.
I seriously believe that Satan uses
pms as spiritual warfare.
I was cranky for the past few days...
...pushing my boys away every chance I found I quiet corner to burrow in.
...calling my husband a "jerk" (really for no reason...but at the time thought it was justified)
...failed to work out because "I just didn't feel like it."
...wrote a semi passive aggressive post to a friend to blow off steam after a looooonggggg phone conversation with her....about the same exact issue where is was VERY direct and somewhat rude.
...refused to call my best friend back until I can be sunshiny again after she called and left a message thanking us for a package sent.
Don't get me wrong, there have been snippets of lucidness.
Where I'm happy, and wanting to be around others.
And then today: I'm tired, stomach achy, ornery, cold, and just plain cranky.
And I feel a good cry coming on.
So, yes...I'm hormonal.
But...I'm not going end this post on a negative nelly note. So, I'm going to do my 5 thankful things on the blog today instead of my journal:
1. Girl's night out tonight. I miss these ladies and think the world of them all. I'm so glad to see them again.
2. My husband was quick to forgive after I apologized for calling him a "jerk."
3. An unexpected email from my niece today. There is such a special spot in my heart for her, and it just made my day.
4. My boys are getting along! (knock on wood). A. has been asking C. to play with him more and more.
5. Girl's night out tonight! Total worthy of 2 entries. :)
Ok, Normal Sandy will be back Thursday...I hope. :)
4 comments:
Awww Sandy. I will be praying for you throughout the day. And I agree - Satan does use PMS as Spiritual warefare. He uses anything and everything that he can.
or spiritual warfare even. OOPS.
Hoping you're out of the funk very soon!
Even happy people have down days. Wish I could hug you (here's where being my neighbor would benefit YOU, instead of you always benefitting me!) ;)
I feel your funk. ((((HUGS))))
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