Thursday, March 1, 2012

She picked me.

For those of you who aren't dog-people, this post is not for you.

You see, my Molly-girl has been acting sick for a week or so.

On Tuesday I took her to the vet because she wasn't bouncing back.

Lab results showed kidney failure.

Her labs were so high, they were literally off the charts.

There's no cure for kidney failure.

Just treatment.  Very expensive treatment that will only prolong her life for 6 months to a year.

And that wasn't even a guarantee to work for that long.  Just prolong her pain.

The vet actually recommended that we have mercy on Molly, and put her down.

Ohhhh, soooo not the words I wanted to hear.

So....that's what we did.
This afternoon.

One minute, she's here....                                                  

                                       ...and just like that, she's gone.

My baby girl is gone.

Some people just don't get it.

They can't grasp how someone could be heartbroken by the loss of a pet.

Yes, she's a pet...but I'm her person.

She picked me.

Each dog will gravitate (or choose) a person in their "pack" to be their anchor.

The person they love the most.

I was her person.

This earned me her respect, her protection, her whimpers, and her unconditional love.

When she was scared, she searched for me.

When she was happy, she searched for me.

When she was sick, she searched for me.
(which actually wasn't the best deal for me...cause I ended up cleaning it up)

When she wanted to cuddle, she searched for me.

If we were out walking as a family, she walked by me.
(no matter WHO was holding her leash)

There's a special bond between a dog and their person.

Most of it is unspoken. 


She always kept tabs on me.

When I was sick, she didn't leave my side.

And then she got sick, and I stayed by hers as much as I could.

And when I couldn't....she'd move her sick butt over to be near me.

And so now, she's gone.

I'm sad. 

I'm more than just a dog person without a dog.

I'm a dog's person without her dog.

I'll miss you, baby girl.
Thank you for picking me.


Anna said...

I've been there and I am so sorry for your loss.

Sarann said...

So sad, my condolences to you!

Kathy said...

Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry! Molly was such a sweet girl. I am tearing up over here. Big hugs to you!!!

Kim said...

I've only been reading your blog for a couple of weeks (don't even remember where I found your link) and have never commented before. But I wanted to share my condolences with you. We had a wonderful black Lab who passed away last winter after a similar diagnosis. We did have 2 weeks post diagnosis to say good-bye to him, and he passed away on his the morning we were to take him in. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm glad Molly got to be with her person though at the end - I'm sure she was so comforted by your presence.

mrsmarkdave said...

Oh my gosh, Sandy, I don't even know what to say. I am not really a dog person (Ok - I am a dog person but won't admit it to anyone...except for you), but I get it.
We took in a friend's dog last year because he died. Well, we didn't realize it but the dog should've been put down YEARS ago. So, we kept her for 1 week and 6minus2 days (because she loved me so much she ran away but was found after 2 days), and then we decided to have mercy on her and put her down. I was devastated, and I didn't even love her because she hated me for various reasons. I mean - I cried for days and actually acted like I think I might have if my own parent would've died. I called my mom crying so hard I couldn't even talk to her. And she wasn't even mine, and I didn't even like her (too much).
I am so, so sorry. Whenever I report to Dave a funny story I refer to you (because he can't keep my online peeps straight) as the one who has the same issues with FB people as I do and the one that had the black dog with the flour on her head. (after taking a look at these pictures, I think I'm wrong about her being black.) That is the cutest picture. I know she'll be missed. And I'm sorry for what you're going through. I'm also tearing up

Mama M. said...

Oh Sandy. I'm am crying. I feel so, so bad for your broken heart. There are no words that will make you feel better, but I SOOOOOO wish we really were neighbors and I could come hug you and try to make you smile...
Molly was a beautiful girl...hold her memories tight.

Lesley said...

I'm so sorry Sandy. You know I'm not a dog person, but I am still sad for my friend who is. Peace to you.

Sarah said...

So sorry, Sandy. They really do become part of the family and having to let them go is extremely difficult. :(

Nicole said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. What a sweet looking dog. I have always been a dog person and I know what you are going through. Take care and comfort in knowing that you two had a beautiful life together.
Many hugs to you!

Joy and Randy said...

My heart aches for you because I know how much you loved Molly. But I KNOW you will find the next member of the 'brat pack' to call you their person. :) Much love, Joy

Anonymous said...

I love that dog... I missed her bark this morning. It is such a hard thing because they are not "just" a dog, they are family. We know them and love them.
Love you, friend!

Keri said...

I know that dogs and cats aren't the same (because let's face it- who really loves cats?) But we had to put down our 2 cats because they were peeing in the basement and I was convinced that I hated them- and I still cried for 3 days.. So I can't imagine what it must be like for you. I'm so sorry for your loss, Sandy.

Brittney said...

:( I am so, so sorry. One of the hardest things to go through.